I got tagged last month ...( yes I know I am a little slow in getting to it) by Eph2810. It was a Valentine Meme about marriage... The questions were :"What's one thing you have learned to do differently to make your marriage better? Or one thing you think is important to a good marriage?".
Well Guppy and I have both been married before. We have both learned what not to do in a marriage ,which is great. Alot of people would be bitter and resentful to thier ex-spouse. Guppy and I are both very grateful for the fact that they both have taught us what we do not want in a spouse/marriage. That is a great thing. I believe that our first marriages are one reason that we are the way we are with each other...
So that being said ...everything we do has made this marriage different,and here is how. Also here are things I think are most important in making a good marriage.
I believe that THE most important thing to not only a good marriage but a GREAT marriage is God. I believe that HE above all comes first.I believe that you both should be evenly yoked... I have seen so many marriage that were not,and it is so hard on it. I believe when both spouses have the understanding that you come second to God it is an awesome thing. Then I believe that you have got to put your marriage/each other above all else. Yes I am meaning kids,friends, family and everything else. I know most will say Whaooooooooo my kids come first no matter what. That is ok for you ...but I believe that without a strong marriage and foundation to set that example ...You are hurting your child in thier development of relationships. Children will imitate what they see. They will more often then not ...Do what you do more then what you say. You have to lead by example just like you do as a disciple of Jesus Christ. I have seen so many marriages end because one spouse orthe other is obsessed with thier childresn lives. They are so consumed in everything thier child wants or is doing that they have no time for each other.
I believe that you have to have a great deal of respect for each other. You have to be very willing to forgive and not dwell on each others shortcomings. You have to learn to praise the other for thier strengths. I am not saying that is always easy. Lord knows it is not at all easy at times.
I also believe that prayer is a very VERY important part of a great marriage. There is some serious power in praying for your spouse. You have to also be willing to pray for yourself. For God to change you as well.
I beleieve that intimacy is so important. I beleieve that you need that daily.I am not just talking about sex,although that is important. I mean little things that only you two share. Like the fact that when Guppy and I hug sometimes we will just both start dancing in the embrace to music that we both here in our hearts. It is always a very intimate moment. There are things you can do that strengthen that bond that take only seconds. Sometimes a look, a kiss, a hug, a word. Each couple is different, I am sure you get the point.
Last but certianly not least I believe to have a successful and GREAT marriage. The woman must submit to her husband. The man must be the head of the household. That is the way God ordained it to be and that is the way it must be. There is awesome power in submission. You can change the heart of a man just by your love and fear of the Lord. He will see that shining through you.I don't think that means that you must bow to him and he is the one that must do it all ,as you wait on him hand and foot. I do believe that he is to lead the family. I believe that you can have an opinion but ultimately he makes the final decision. I believe that wholeheartedly. In the same respect I believe that does not give the husband the right to be demannding and abusive, but quite the contrary. I believe he should treat the woman with the utmost respect. He should treat her like a delicate flower. He should love her with every thing he has.
1Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, 2when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. 3Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. 4Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight. 5For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to make themselves beautiful. They were submissive to their own husbands, 6like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her master. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear.
7Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.
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